Musings and Pictures

I've been going a bit picture crazy the last few days. Brad just seems to be growing so fast! I want to capture every cute thing he does. I imagine every other mom out there is the same way though.

I got a call yesterday from the picture studio where we had our holiday photo taken last year. They said I had won a free 8x10! I asked what the catch was, they said no catch, just pay for any extra sizes/poses I want. So we all dressed up in our winter sweaters and went in this morning for a photo shoot! They took several poses, but we agreed on a family one for the 8x10. I didn't order anything else at that time, but I may when the pic comes in on Dec. 1st. Here is Brad's outfit for the picture:

Isn't he a cutie???!!!

He loves to get into my kitchen cabinets and pull out random things and carry them around. He also likes to leave little trinkets in my bowls and drawers, like outlet protectors or plastic animals. He's a mess!

Yes he likes to eat apples! He mostly likes to take a bite of mine while I am eating one. So far he has been such a good eater! He went thru a sort of picky phase awhile back, but he seems to be over that now.

I have amped up the cooking lately! I turned 5lbs of apples into homemade cinnamon and brown sugar applesauce (YUM). And today I finally made homemade pesto! I have had the recipe for a long time, but never could bring myself to buy some fresh basil because it's a bit pricey! I finally bought some this week at the store, and that way I HAD to make it or else the basil would go bad. You are supposed to use a food processor (which I don't have) but I used a blender. It was pretty hard but I managed to get it to work. We had some tonight on tortellini and OH OH OH it was delish!! I called my dad immediately to let him know what I had done! All of my Italian ancestors would be proud.

With the holidays on us, and Brad becoming old enough to enjoy them, I have really been thinking lately about how different I feel after becoming a mother. It is a feeling that you can't really describe or prepare someone for--you just have to experience it on your own. Before we had Brad, we really just hung out and did whatever we wanted at whatever time. We didn't really have to plan ahead for things like traveling--just made sure the cats were fed and that was about it!

We also didn't have big holiday plans or traditions. Sure we had a family dinner and I decorated the house, but as far as special little things there wasn't much. But now that we have Brad, we are both very aware of just how much of an effect we will have on his life. In 20 years he will look back on his early childhood, and I can only pray that he has warm and loving memories of how he was raised. This awareness of power is intimidating, and it makes us want to do the most we can to make his childhood fulfilling. I want to do all of the little things that kids remember, like bake cookies with him, go trick-or-treating, fill his stocking early Christmas morning before he wakes up, leave a Easter basket by his bedside Easter morning, read the Nativity story by a fire on Christmas Eve. A child will remember those moments forever, and I have the power to give him those memories. How humbling!

I despise watching the news...more and more it seems every single time I involuntarily catch it there is a new story about some poor infant or toddler that was abused and beaten to death. It bothers me very greatly, sometimes probably more than it should. It keeps me up at night and I think about it for days. At first I feel immense anger at this horrible people who should have never had children and should be sterilized. Then the grief and sadness sets in for this helpless baby who didn't ask to be put on this Earth and only knew pain and hatred it's short life. Even now, tears come to me as I try to imagine how a human being could be so violent with an innocent child. And then I see that the courts aren't going to charge them with murder because they plead GUILTY. Why is killing a child not murder? Does a baby's life have less worth than an adults? Do they think that only a few years in prison will "reform" these killers and keep them from ever harming another child?

I only get peace when I remind myself that they will have to stand before God and be judged, and that innocent child is finally out of pain.