Monday, October 6, 2008

Not What I Wanted to Hear.

I got the call today from the doctor's office about my leftover embryos and if they were able to be frozen at all. They were not. Not one of them. I'm pretty distraught about it, I'm hoping this is not an indication of how well the two they transferred will do. I've got 9 1/2 more days until my beta and I swear this will be the death of me. I feel so much pressure now if this does work, because if we lost the baby, there is no "do-over". And if it doesn't work, then that embryo picture just cost me $15,000 dollars because insurance did NOT cover any of my stuff.

So I'm in limbo here, trying so hard to stay optimistic. I've read about several people whose first IVF did not work, but then the frozen embryo transfer worked. I have no second chance. I really do not think we will do this again if it is unsuccessful because that is just so much money, and we could adopt and have a child for that. But I don't think I'm ready to give up on being pregnant just yet.

As for me, I'm slowly getting better. The abdominal swelling is finally going down, and the pain is almost gone.

Please keep us in your prayers through this very hard and taxing time, we need all of the help we can get!

6 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry about that. I completely understand...we didn't have any to freeze either and they originally retrieved 19 eggs out of me. Don't stress out though---that won't help your body or mind at this point. (I can say that too because I've been there!) Your embryo pictures look BEAUTIFUL! Really! Mine did not look like that...I keep seeing everyone's embryo pictures and thinking, "oh,is that what they are supposed to look like?" Mine fragmented horribly. Anyways, just believe and pray over those two babies inside of you right now!

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  2. I am saying a prayer for you...I know the waiting must be so hard! Just be very kind to yourself and keep talking to God...He is with you~!

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  3. Don't think any negative thoughts. Just wait until your beta, I know it's the hardest thing in the world to do. There's a lot of us that know how hard it is! But you can't make any assumptions right now. It's way too early for that. I agree with Susan, my embryo's didn't look like that either, yours look really good. I'm praying for you! That's all you can do now is wait and pray. I can't tell you how much I prayed during the 2 week wait. It was pretty much every waking moment. Hang in there and I'll be thinking about you!!

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  4. I will praying for you too...you have so many people that are pulling for you and this new chapter of your life. I have gone through two IVF cycles and did not have any to freeze either time. I was very devastated too, but I am ready to jump in the saddle and try again. I pray that you will not have to go through that...it's all in God's time.

    Praying for you every single day!

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  5. I'm so sorry to hear your news. Like everyone above has assured you-God is with you right now and he is watching over you and your babies! Just make the best effort you can to mentally stay calm and relaxed-I've not done IVF-but during the time of my miscarriage I was stressed to the max with everything. So just make as much effort as you can to stay relaxed and optimistic. Its probably the hardest thing ever-but I know enough about you to know you are one strong willed woman! Now that your off for the week rest every minute you can! :0)

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  6. I am so sorry to hear about that. Just stay positive- maybe you don't need any extra embryos! That would be awesome! Pray for patience and peace over the whole situation! You are in my thoughts and prayers!

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