A Very Special Day

Today was our second ultrasound, and Nick and I got to see our baby's heart beating! It was amazing. I think it's finally setting in that I'm pregnant. The heartbeat was 117, and I read that it will get faster as the weeks go on. Here is what my baby looks like right now, you can see it better inside the sac:

Everything is still looking really good, I only have one more appointment with my RE and then they will release me to my regular OB!! I told him I'll miss him because we've gotten close over these last few months, and he gave me a hug! I'll have to bring them some cookies or something with my next visit.

I go back on November 13 for one more ultrasound, and that's it! I also started an actual journal for the pregnancy to write about each visit and special thing that happens, and about symptoms and things I go through so that I have something to physically go back and look at in the future.

That's all for now, thanks for reading!

My Little Lentil

Today I am 6 weeks along, and progressing nicely so far! No changes yet, but I know that morning sickness is lurking around the corner. Here is what my baby looks like right now:

Right now it is about the size of a lentil, or 1/4 of an inch long. Me and the hubby are anxiously awaiting the Thursday ultrasound where we will be able to see his/her heartbeat finally! I made my first appointment with my new OB doc because my old one doesn't deliver at my hospital. I see her on December 3.

That's it for now, thanks for reading! Check back on Thursday for ultrasound #2 :)

First Ultrasound!

Today was our first ultrasound, and everything went well. We have one very nice looking gestational sac, and we are going back next Thursday to see the heartbeat! I gotta say, I was really hoping for twins, but I'll take what I can get!

The text that you see around the sac is where the Dr. put an arrow to the embryo and typed "HI MOM AND DAD". It was so cute!!! I can't wait until we get another one next week.

I haven't started the Progesterone gel yet because I was waiting to find out how many more weeks I was going to need it because the box only came with 18. Well I've got 5 more weeks ahead of me, so I'll be having to purchase another one after awhile. And yes, the gel goes where you think it goes :( But anything is better than stabbing my self everyday!

Symptoms are still pretty much the same. I keep waiting for the vomiting to hit, which I'm sure it will at the most inopportune time. I have a vomit bag on tap in my car, and I can always get more from work. My Dr. told me that taking vitamin B6 and Ginger Root help alot with morning sickness. So I went and bought those today for when I need it. I read that it usually starts between weeks 6 and 8, so it will be soon!

I also bought some lotion for the belly so *crossing fingers* I don't get stretch marks. I read that vitamin E and Collagen are the best ingredients for it, so that's what I got. We'll see how it goes.

I guess that's it for now, if anything happens or I feel the need to blog before next Thursday, it will be on here. Otherwise next week is the heartbeat!!!!!

5 Weeks and Beta #2

I should be sleeping right now, but I just got the call from my Dr. and he had TWO bits of wonderful news for me!

2nd Beta 18 days past 3 day transfer: 1589

Isn't that fabulous??? Four days ago, it was 314, and I did a little math according to the "rule" that is should double about every 31 hours. So I guesstimated that today it should be around 950. As you can see, it far exceeded my expectations!! I really do want twins, and that brings me to the next bit of news....

Our first ultrasound is Wednesday!!! Yes, as in the day after tomorrow!! This will be my marker for myself to let down my guard a bit and start to get more excited. Not to mention I'll probably spill the beans to a few more people. Of course almost everyone at my work already knows cause I've been running my mouth through the whole process!! Everyone is so happy for me, and I am working on aquiring my very OWN copy of "What to Expect When You're Expecting".

I guess I kind of got a third bit of good news. As most of us know who are involved in the IVF process, after retrieval you must do an IM shot of Progesterone everyday until about 8 weeks gestation. Well I have been doing it for a whole 2 weeks now, and my butt is so freakin sore. I'm not kidding. Bruising, knots, pain going down through my hip. I told the nurse about it last Thursday when I got my first HCG, and she said "Well you know you can also do the shot in your thigh?" HAHAHA, if you haven't read the story about when I did that, you should. I informed her that I tried that and my right leg was rendered nearly useless for 3 days. So that option of course is out. I tried to stick it out for a few more days, but I highly doubt I could suffer through this for 3 more weeks! So I talked to my wonderful doc about it this morning, and he more than happily prescribed me some gel to do instead! I'm pretty happy about that. Here are some pics of the damage:

Left cheek

Right cheek

So as you can see my derriere is not a happy camper. Well that's all the big news for today! As for symptoms, I've been very tired, and eating a lot, and peeing more than usual. Not really having any cramps for the last several days, just the occasional twinge. No spotting at all either! So far, so good. Keep us in your prayers, and check back Wednesday for the ultrasound blog!!!

In a "Beta" Mood

It's official!! We're expecting! I have been waiting over 5 1/2 years to say that, and my time has finally come. I know the next few weeks will be the most vital, and my optimism is growing. I just want one more good beta and the ultrasound, and I will be good to go! We probably won't broadcast it to the world until we get to about 8 weeks, just as a precaution. But the close people in our lives will know of course :)

#1 Beta 14 days past 3 day transfer = 314

The lines don't seem to be getting any darker on my tests, but I haven't taken any other kind yet so maybe this is just how dark they get? But I will probably stop testing everyday now that I've been confirmed!

I think I may still be in shock, but I'll slowly get used to it! The hubby is getting more and more excited, and keeps calling me "preggo mama". It's so cute! I have looked up all kinds of info on beta levels, and the next one should give us an inclination of multiples, hopefully. If any of you out there reading this would like to tell me what you're betas were and if you had one, two, or three, feel free to!!!!

Here is what the embryo(s) look like this week:

Stay tuned for my second beta on Monday morning!!! (I'll post it in the afternoon since I'll be sleeping after working Sunday night)

A Bit Excessive, I Know

You know you love me :) So here is my test from today. Darker as you can see!!! Hubby is starting to get excited, but still cautiously waiting on the beta. I promise I'm not going to continue to put this up everyday, just wanted to show this one too! I'm proud, what can I say?

4 Weeks!

I know I'm a goober, but by God I'm going to milk this for all it's worth! My beautiful second line is progressively getting darker, and I am finally able to capture it on my camera to show you guys! Here they are, all lined up for you:

I am dying for Thursday to get here! On a non-pregnancy cycle, I would have been due to start my period either yesterday or today. But I have had nothing show up, so I'm hoping and praying it doesn't! I have been feeling kind of "twingey" in my uterus area. Not really crampy, more twingey. But I do have a story for you...

We all know the progesterone shots go in the muscle in the bum. Well my left bum was off limits for awhile cause the dear husband went a bit too close to the middle and I swear he hit bone. So that was verrrry sore and has a knot on it still. So for two day after that, I did my own shot but can only do it on the right bum since I'm right handed. Well Saturday I woke up in the afternoon all hot and cranky and needing to pee (frequent urination??). Turns out hubby wasn't home, and never came back home before I left for work that evening. So I couldn't do the left one by myself, and the right one was getting pretty sore. I really didn't want to subject any of my coworkers to my "cheeks", so I figured I would do it in my thigh since that is also a place you can give IM shots. So in the right thigh I go, the needle didn't really hurt. But shortly after injecting the medicine....oh my dear Lord. I of course did it right before I had to run out the door for work, so I proceeded to hobble around grabbing my bags and whatnot to leave. Then the rest of the night I suffered as my thigh proceeded to throb and ache. It's kind of like that ache right before you get a muscle cramp.

Don't worry about hubby though, he was merely out with a friend. I put him through a nice guilt trip for leaving me high and dry on the shot, and he vowed to never do it again. Well that was Saturday, and today is Monday, and yes it still throbs. So we are back to the cheeks, lesson learned. Note to self: do NOT inject progesterone into thighs.

Not Too Proud to Eat my Words

Evidently my bout of self pity made a difference, because the very next day (Friday) I got a faint second line. Yes ladies and gentlemen, those elusive second lines do exist!!!!! So after my excitement started to build while doing endless research on the internet, I took another one later that day. Same result, faint second line. Too faint to photograph unfortunately, my camera does NOT like close up pictures.

Soooo this morning after I got home from work I took another one and let it kind of dry while I took off my makeup and stuff. I put it next to the one from yesterday, and it is definitely darker than yesterdays!! I am now officially the most pregnant I have ever been before! I am still trying to keeps my hopes in reserve until I at least get two good betas and an affirmative ultrasound. But I am a worrier, I think I will always be fearing the "worst" that could happen. It is a side effect of working in the ICU where people come in who actually have the "worst" happening to them.

I have searched through tons of stories and experiences and research on the internet about chemical pregnancies and whatnot, and most all of them say that if it is positive and then consecutively negative, that is most likely a chemical pregnancy. So I will continue to test everyday until my beta on Oct. 16, and monitor for that damn second line!! But until then, I'm putting this on here because I don't know if I'll be able to use it later on. Humor me people :)

7 Days Past 3 Day Transfer

Nothing much going on with me, yes I'm weak and I've been taking an HPT everyday starting day 4 past transfer. Yes they have all been BFN. My pain is gone, but with my shot yesterday I think my hubby got my hip bone cause it hurt sooooooo bad when he did it, and now there is a knot at the site and my hip hurts. *Sigh*

I don't know if my moodiness should be a good sign, or a sign that AF is going to show up soon. I have been very cranky, and mostly depressed and hopeless. I know it's too soon to tell, it's not the HPT getting me down. I just have this premonition if you will, that it didn't work. I hope to God that it did, and I know I've done everything right. I just don't feel like it worked. It's more psychological than physical. I hope to be proved wrong next Thursday.

This is what my kitty Cuddles was doing...

So a BIG thank you to all of the people who have been praying for me and supporting me on here, and in real life :). I truly do appreciate it. This has been a very hard time for me, and I am ready for the next 7 days to fly by. If anything else happens before the 16th I will post an update, but I'm not expecting it to so check back then!!!!!

Not What I Wanted to Hear.

I got the call today from the doctor's office about my leftover embryos and if they were able to be frozen at all. They were not. Not one of them. I'm pretty distraught about it, I'm hoping this is not an indication of how well the two they transferred will do. I've got 9 1/2 more days until my beta and I swear this will be the death of me. I feel so much pressure now if this does work, because if we lost the baby, there is no "do-over". And if it doesn't work, then that embryo picture just cost me $15,000 dollars because insurance did NOT cover any of my stuff.

So I'm in limbo here, trying so hard to stay optimistic. I've read about several people whose first IVF did not work, but then the frozen embryo transfer worked. I have no second chance. I really do not think we will do this again if it is unsuccessful because that is just so much money, and we could adopt and have a child for that. But I don't think I'm ready to give up on being pregnant just yet.

As for me, I'm slowly getting better. The abdominal swelling is finally going down, and the pain is almost gone.

Please keep us in your prayers through this very hard and taxing time, we need all of the help we can get!

Post-Transfer and Baby Pic!

Sorry I didn't get on till today, my computer is upstairs and I have been stationed downstairs. The transfer went well, it was in the same room that my retrieval was in. We got the embryo picture first off, and Nick was able to hold my hand the entire time. Before the procedure started and we were in the room alone, I said a prayer for us that the next two weeks will pass quickly and be successful.

After confirming placement of the catheter in my uterus, the doctor inserted the embryos, then made sure none were still in the syringe. After they called all clear, he removed the speculum and had me lay there for about 15 minutes before I could go pee. Then we were free to go, but he advised that I lay down in the backseat on the way home, LOL. The rest of the day I vegged out on the couch (which has now caused my back to hurt) and took it easy.

I can't believe we are already to this point!!! Next week I will be busy, so hopefully the next two weeks go by fast. Our official test date when they will do the HCG blood draw is on October 16. Everyone, please keep us in your prayers, and thank you to those who have been.

I don't ask for much, I just want to be a mama!

The Big Day...

I just got the call from Dr. Haas, and there are two embryos that are doing the best out of all of them, so we are going to go ahead and do the transfer tomorrow afternoon!!! I will be getting a picture, and he said we will freeze the leftover ones that make it to the blastocyst stage. I'm so excited!!! This had better work cause I really don't want to go through another egg retrieval. It has not been fun. But we do what we have to do, and I will blog tomorrow about how it goes.

Keep me in your prayers!