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This blog was started in 2008 when we did IVF for the first time to build our family after 5 1/2 years of infertility. We now have 14 and 8 year old boys (thanks to modern medicine) and we are enjoying our blessed life as parents ♥ In the summer of 2016 we took another huge step and moved across the country from Oklahoma to New York! This blog is about life and everything in between



Monday, July 28, 2014

The Phone Call

I got the phone call today from my RE. No embryos made it to the freezing stage. Again.

I had somehow forgotten they were going to call me today. I was grabbing my purse and heading out the door with Brad for a day full of grocery shopping and errands. When the phone rang and I saw who it was my first thought was "they can't know if I'm pregnant or not--I haven't had blood drawn yet!" Of course silly--they were calling to crush my hopes once more!

Here is my post from the first time in 2008 when I got the same phone call. I feel exactly the same this time as I did that day 6 years ago. I know I'm blessed to have one healthy baby, but I don't think it's too much to ask for a second one to love.

The way I feel right now is this--if this time doesn't work then I want us to move next year and get a fresh start. For real. Sorry mom.

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Friday, July 25, 2014

IVF #2 Embryo Transfer Day



Say hello to my babies! These were the best 2 out of the 10 that fertilized. Please say a HUGE prayer for me that they stick!! The transfer was this afternoon at 3:30pm and my doctor came in on his day off to do it himself. Your bladder has to be full to help them visualize the uterus on the US and boy was mine F-U-L-L. After the transfer they had me lay there for 15 minutes before I got up. And that was it! My official blood draw for the pregnancy test is scheduled for August 6 at 9am. I have a handy dandy countdown on the side! ----------------------------------------->

As for my ovaries, they are slowly calming down and deflating. I weighed myself the day of my egg retrieval (Tuesday) and I was up TEN pounds from my usual!!! I have since come down 5 but can definitely feel the remaining 5 in my belly. I did a lot of reading about other people's experiences and it seems like that is the norm. All of the little follicles that get eggs removed fill with fluid after the retrieval, and some people get more fluid than others. It then spills over into the abdomen and makes you super bloated for up to a week or two. If it's really bad then it can impede your breathing and get into your lungs. This is known as OHSS (ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome) and can land you in the hospital. The doc has you watch for signs and symptoms for several weeks after the egg retrieval.

The progesterone shots are also no bueno.....I've had 5 so far and already my bum is getting sore. I have to continue one shot of it each day until I can convince the doctor to switch me to progesterone suppositories, or till 10 weeks.....whichever comes first!

With my first IVF I got a positive HPT on day 8 after the transfer, so I will not test at home until next Friday. My doctor compared the embryo's growth to my first IVF and he said they were almost identical. The two they transferred are just about the same quality as the two I had transferred in 2008. I hope that means at least one will stick!!

I'm trying to stay positive during this wait but it's oh-so-hard. I know I only have a 50/50 chance of it working so I have to be realistic. I hope these next 2 weeks fly by!!!!


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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

10 Babies



I finally got an update from the doctor! They retrieved 16 eggs, 13 were mature and 10 fertilized! So right now we have 10 little babies growing in a petri dish. They will call again tomorrow with another update on their progress. I will be doing the embryo transfer either Friday or Sunday and I should find that out tomorrow also.

Here is my post from last time about how many fertilized etc.....

As for the retrieval, it went well! We got there at 6:15am and got started in preop. They took my vitals and started an IV in my right hand. The anesthesiologist I requested was there so it was nice to see a familiar face! He started me off with some Morphine, then Versed and other sedatives in the procedural room. It was like deja vu! It was the same room I was in last time. It only took about 30 minutes and I woke up pretty easily afterward.

After they went over my postop instructions they showed Nick how and where to do the Progesterone shots. I got one there, then did another one last night. Today I will start them once per day until further notice. They really don't hurt much (if they are done right) but I know after several days of getting shots in the same spot over and over it will start to get sore!

I camped out on the couch yesterday with a mug of ice water and a heating pad. The pain really was not near what I anticipated from last time so I was pretty happy about that. However early this morning I woke up around 4am with terrible heartburn and a pounding headache. I got up and took some Zantac and Tylenol but it did not help. After I got up for the day I took my Norco and some PeptoBismol but it really hasn't helped much either. The abdomenal pain isn't what is bothering me--it's the headache and reflux/nausea!

I'm relaxing on the couch again today and I had Nick fill my Phenergan prescription to see if that would help. A cool washcloth helps a little with the headache, I just hope it goes away soon. I am going back to work tomorrow so we will see how that goes!
 
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Sunday, July 20, 2014

The Time Has Come!

Finally! I got the word today from my doctor that my egg retrieval will be Tuesday morning! I have had appointments every morning for the last 3 days to do US and blood work to watch my follicle size and estrogen level very closely. My follicles have been growing a couple of millimeters every day so I had a feeling today would be the day for my trigger shot!

For those who aren't familiar with the IVF process, first we medicate to stimulate the ovaries to produce several follicles. Next is the trigger shot (Hcg) that tells the ovaries to finish maturing the follicles to prepare for ovulation. It has to be exactly timed 35 hours before the egg retrieval. During the egg retrieval they will sedate me and remove the follicles that are large enough:




Doesn't that look fun???

After the egg retrieval they take the eggs into the lab will manual insert the sperm into each one (ICSI = intra-cytoplasmic sperm injection). They will watch the ones that fertilize in the lab and 3-5 days later they will transfer the 2 best back into my uterus. Then we wait!

I just hope I'm not in as much pain after this retrieval as I was with my first one. I am taking off work on Tuesday and Wednesday, and my embryo transfer will either be on Friday or Sunday. My mother will be watching Brad the day and night of my retrieval so that I can pop my pain pills and chill on the couch for awhile until I feel like getting up and around.

Check back Tuesday evening and I will post the update of how many eggs they got!! Here is my post from last time that goes over how the fertilization went of the eggs they retrieved. Say a prayer for me and my eggs!!!


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Saturday, July 19, 2014

Day 7


  • fatigue
  • crankiness
  • pin cushion
  • every other day doctor visits
  • junkie
  • bloated
  • bruised
  • intermittent painful twinges on ovaries

So yeah I am finishing up day 7 of my drugs! Ultrasounds have looked good but bloodwork has shown a rising estrogen level so they have been reducing my dosage of Gonal-F each day. I started stim drugs on Saturday with Gonal-F at 150U injections. On Tuesday I did 100U, on Wednesday I did 75U, yesterday I did 50U, and today they told me NO Gonal-F. I am still doing 5U of Lupron each day as well as 75U of Menopur.

I had a doctor visit this morning and my follies are getting big! They measured 9 on each side, and there were several smaller ones that weren't measured. They initially made my next visit for Sunday morning, but after the bloodwork came back they called and want me there tomorrow morning for another US and more blood draws. I am *crossing fingers* that they do the retrieval on Monday. I am ready to be done with this and move on to the next step!

I would definitely say the most prominent "side effect" is fatigue. I sleep 8-9 hours a night and am still exhausted through the day. They said that is from the high estrogen level (mine today is about 2,200). How fun! I also feel like I have more hair falling out than usual, but that might just be me....

As for the shots, I have found the most comfortable way to inject them is to keep the Menopur on the abdomen, and the Gonal-F and Lupron on each arm. The Menopur burns and is the most volume so I just alternate sides each day. One of my Lupron shots was given a bit too high up on my arm and resulted in a nasty looking bruise that has hung on for a few days now. I now do the fat-pinching while hubby gives the injection, that way the location is where it should be....

Hopefully tomorrow they will give me more of an idea when the retrieval will be. I asked my doc today about it and he said most likely Tuesday or Wednesday. That's why I was surprised when they called and wanted me back in tomorrow morning. Maybe my little follies are growing faster than they thought!

Wish me luck, patience, and tolerance.

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Sunday, July 13, 2014

Delectable Injectables

 Alright kids, it just got real tonight. I started my LAST 2 drugs until my egg retrieval! I am now on 3 injections--Lupron, Menopur, and Gonal-F. They are all sub-q and Nick is my nurse that gives them. I started Lupron 2 weeks ago at 10 units/day, and tonight I decreased that to 5 units/day. The Menopur is 1 vial/day (which is 75 units) and my current dose of Gonal-F is 150 units/day.




I go to the RE every other day next week for bloodwork and US to monitor the progression of my follicle stimulations and my dosages will be adjusted as needed. Hopefully in about 8 or 9 days we will be doing the egg retrieval! I can't wait to get thru this and be done waiting. I HATE WAITING. You think the 2ww after ovulation is bad? This is like that x1,000.

I have more optimism than my last IVF but I have to consciously reel myself in from shopping for baby stuff and remind myself that this may not work. It might not be just like last time. I allow myself about 1 hour of naive hope per day, but after that I am a realist who knows the chance is 50/50.

I am definitely more vocal with friends and family about the process this time. I feel like it's a bunch a of crap that women are afraid to talk about their infertility/reproductive issues because it is "taboo" or dirty to talk about. Infertility is a freaking medical issue that needs to be given the respect it deserves--not only by friends but by the insurance companies who REFUSE to cover treatment at all!! In my state that is... I'm not lucky enough to live in a state that actually covers some infertility treatments. IVF is a medical procedure and you better be sure that I'm going to request a few days off from work when I go to have my egg retrieval. Last time (read here) my egg retrieval ended with me getting a catheter leg bag for 3 days and writhing in pain on the couch popping pain pills.

Anywho....let the stimulation week begin!


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Saturday, July 12, 2014

The Funnest Way to Get Vitamin D

I am happy to report that our pool is done, filled, and ready to swim in! Our pool guys came out Wednesday and put the brand new liner in. He had us fill it partially that night, then he came back the next day to check on it and finish up a few things. We ran the hose the rest of that day and evening and it was full before bedtime!





It looks amazing and we are VERY happy with the design that we picked out. I was pleasantly surprised that the temperature is already comfortable enough to get in without the COLD shock. I thought since it was hose water that it would be freezing, but our weather found the perfect time to reach the 100s! To finish off the "new" pool, we also ordered a new tablet floater, skimmer lid, and thermometer that should arrive in the mail next week.




You can tell everyone is very happy to beat the heat in the pool. We threw some chlorine in it last night and ran the pump to keep the water looking tip top. In a few days we are supposed to get a cold front (high in the 70s) and lots of rain so we will try to enjoy it a bunch before then!

PS I plan on doing another post later today about my IVF meds and how that is going! Check back later.

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Tuesday, July 8, 2014

If This Works...



  • I will be due on April 15, 2015
  • Brad will be a big brother!
  • Brad will be almost 6 when he/she is born
  • I will deliver at St. Anthony hospital
  • I am considering using a doula this time for a more natural delivery
  • I do NOT want to be induced again
  • I will keep the baby in my room for the first few months while nursing
  • Baby will share a room with Brad (for now)
  • I will be the happiest person in the world :)


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Saturday, July 5, 2014

Independence Day 2014

I hope everyone had a great July 4! We made our annual pilgrimage to my dad's house in Tuttle with more family than ever before. There was a total of 8 kids and 9 adults with tons of food and even more fireworks. My dad manned the grill while I was the sous chef and everything turned out perfectly. The kids had a great time running in the huge yard and when it finally got dark we lit the night sky up for hours!








We didn't pack up and head home until around midnight and after a quick shower we all passed out and slept in. I was actually on call for work from 7am yesterday until 7am this morning so I had my pager and cell phone in my pocket but never got called in! I wouldn't have minded the holiday pay--maybe next year.

While we were there, I harvested a few pounds of fresh organic plums from my dad's fruit tree. Time to make something with them! One day I'll have my own fruit trees to harvest from....


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Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Fun at Turnerfalls

On Sunday Bradley and I were invited to go with my brother out to Turnerfalls! It is one of the VERY few pretty places in Oklahoma about an hour's drive from where I live. We packed up and headed south for a day of fun in the sun!


This was Brad's first time here and he loved it! He was a little freaked out by walking on the rocks and mossy creek bottom but he chilled out and ended up having a blast playing. I haven't been here in almost 8 years and it looked much better than the last time I was here. The water level was way up and the 77ft falls were the strongest I had ever seen them.



You used to be able to swim underneath the falls and hang out on the rocks, but that is roped off now and you can only swim out in the open water area. The water is strangely blue (and cold!) but also surprisingly clear almost all the way to the bottom.
 


Downstream from the falls is a long winding creek with terraced rocks and a good current that you can float along and splash around in the pools. We had fun walking along it and swimming in the different areas.
 


We all had a fun time and thankfully I remembered to bring sunscreen! It was the perfect way to cool off on a hot humid day.
 
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